April 2012
Issues
I have the worst issues in the world.
Trust and jealous. I have no reason not to trust and absolutely no reason to be jealous. Nothing positive comes from being jealous, It won’t solve anything. He gives me every reason to trust him. And is constanty reassuring me, so I feel secure. SO ALL MY PROBLEMS ARE MY FAULT… YAY.
we were introduced, and i said hello.
thedustdancestoo:
the beginning of things were quiet and relatively inconsequential but i think we both felt it, i think we both knew,
like the premonition of a storm on the back of a neck,
(or inside a heart)
that something beautiful was coming.
Computer: Monitor, display this document, okay?
Monitor: No prob, boss.
Computer: Okay, now it looks like the mouse is moving around. Monitor, can you move the pointer icon accordingly?
Monitor: Anything you ask, boss.
Computer: Great, great, okay. Mouse, where are you going now?
Mouse: Over the icon panel, sir.
Computer: Hmm, let me know if he clicks anything, okay?
Mouse: Of course.
Keyboard: Sir, he's pressed Ctrl and P simultaneously.
Monitor: Oh god, here we go.
Computer: *sigh* Printer, are you there?
Printer: No.
Computer: Please, Printer, I know you're there.
Printer: No! I'm not here! Leave me alone!
Computer: Jesus. Okay, you really nee-
Mouse: Sir! He's clicked on the printer icon.
Computer: Printer, now you have to print it twice.
Printer: No! No! No! I don't want to! I hate you! I hate printing! I'm turning off!
Computer: Printer, you know you can't turn yourself off. Just print the document twice and we'll leave you alone.
Printer: No! That's what you always say! I hate you! I'm out of ink!
Computer: You are not out of in-
Printer: I'M OUT OF INK!
Computer: *sigh* Monitor, please show a low ink level alert.
Monitor: But sir, he has plen-
Computer: Just do it, damn it!
Monitor: Yes sir.
Keyboard: Ahhh! He's hitting me!
Computer: Stay calm. He'll stop soon. Stay calm, old friend.
Keyboard: He's pressing everything. Oh god, I don't know, he's just pressing everything!
Computer: PRINTER! Are you happy now? See what you've done!
Printer: Ha! That's what you get for trying to make me do work. Next time he- hey! HEY! He's trying to open me! HELP! HELP! Oh god, he's torn out my cartridge! PLEASE! Help! Error!
Monitor: Sir, maybe we should try to help him?
Computer: No. He did this to himself.